February 27, 2012
Well. Today is the day I get to start fighting back and doing something Proactive!
I’m pretty stoked up.
Can’t sleep because of that and I’m STILL shitting my guts out from that bowel prep. Amazing thing that.
I’m dryer than a popcorn fart but was still shitting like a volcano 30 minutes ago. Not sure how you can still have that much water in there after all that.
Damn if I’m not gonna be cleaned out for the Doc though.
OK, I’m gonna be off the net for today at least. No idea when I’ll be able to update ya. It’s all good.
Wish me luck and pray that the Docs have no problems and all that.
When I wake up, “Chucky” will be excised out of there. Ooh Rah!
Thanks again all.
See ya on the other side of this first step.
February 26, 2012
Nothing else describes what I’ve been doing since getting cleaned out from that scope the other day.
Being on steroids for a Lupus associated rash that popped up a few weeks ago too so anything that’s not nailed down has been fair game.
Yesterday, my wife mentioned how much I’ve been eating lately and the only good thing I could think of was to reply –
“Well Honey, you realize I am eating for two, right?”
It sort of feels like that too. Like I have a little Bastard Step Child inside of me trying to kill me.
“My names, Chucky. Wanna Play?!?”
Uh, no thanks dude.
On that front, I am looking forward to having this thing yanked the hell out tomorrow.
I know it’s gonna be uncomfortable and hurt after surgery but, the old saying, “No pain. No gain” seems appropriate here.
Feel free to remind me of that in a few days when I’m whining about my aching ass post surgery.
My daughter brought her old laptop over for me to use while I’m in the hospital this week. It’s in need of some serious TLC and I’m upgrading all the important things now and planning on doing some surgery of my own on it to get it running right today.
It’s funny, here I am at 5 am bouncing back and forth from these 2 computers.
That laptop will really be nice to have and coupled with all the pain meds this could be pretty entertaining for you all too.
Ok, gotta go do more work on that laptop that will require I pay attention.
Yep. You’re out of here tomorrow, Dude.
February 25, 2012
Yesterday was a big chase on paperwork and pre-op things. Wow. So many things to get organized and arranged.
I can see where this could just overwhelm a guy who does not have the support system I do.
Makes me wonder how many folks just say, “I can’t do this” and roll over and just give up?
I can see how this could happen. The sheer volume of crap that needs to be done is incredible. So much on different areas, etc.
Thank God I have my Wife to help me sort this, keep track and organize. I’d be hosed if I had to try and sort it all by myself.
Shout out to Marie, Friend and former coworker who pointed out some much needed advice the other day while talking on the phone w/ the Wife.
Thanks Love! You have no idea how much that little tip has helped already.
Wish you guys were still around here.
DogBoy, the youngest son came down yesterday and chauffeured me around to some places I needed to go. It’s not that I can’t drive or anything, but the idea of me driving around while taking the pain medicine seems kinda stupid.
That’s probably good for a laugh to those who knew me years ago when I was always in some sort of Altered State. Fortunately, those days are long gone.
We had a good time while I got all the pre-op stuff done at the hospital.
It’s amazing how fast things have been moving on that front, too.
What is this, day 10 since I found out about this whole cancer thing?
Whoa. Lots of things in a short period and a bunch more coming up fast. That’s both good and bad, but mostly good.
Good because it’s gotten me on track for fighting this Nasty Crap inside, but bad because I’m the kinda guy who usually needs a bit of time to chew on things and think em through. That’s not been an option with the massive amount of new things coming in. It’s kinda funny how my thinking is sort of about 2 days behind on everything.
It’s all good. Just kinda strange.
Lots of odd thoughts like that running through my head this morning and if this rambling BS doesn’t make any sense don’t worry. Lots of it doesn’t make sense to me either.
Think I’m gonna go try to talk the wife into making breakfast. Since tomorrow is gonna be clear liquids and bowel prep, I’m thinking – BACON!!!!
My new theme song. I woke up with this song in my head and it just seems appropriate. Now let’s see if I can figure out how to post a video on this WordPress format.
Well Crap. I guess you’ll have to follow the link to the youtube video. I’ll figure it out eventually.
Which reminds me.
If you’ve left a comment here and I haven’t responded, it’s not because I’m ignoring you. The wordpress format is still confusing me and taking me some time to grasp.
Way different from what I’m used to.
Old Dog – New Tricks. Vicodin impaired learning curve!
February 23, 2012
To all of you out there that have taken the time to Encourage, Pray and Support me.
It’s only been 7 days ago that all this started.
Wow. So much, so fast.
Like I said the other day- Life turns on a dime sometimes.
So I just wanted to let ya all know I appreciate all that ya have been doing for me.
Believe me. It helps.
February 23, 2012
Doctor SH/NB (Small Hands/Nice Boobs) the surgeon was real direct and explained pretty much everything in detail. Other than a few technical things I wasn’t aware of (Having never worked in surgery) it was pretty straight forward.
Surgery will be Monday Morning 2-27-12 @ 08:30.
Bonus points for 2 things-
1) Won’t be shitting in a bag afterwards. Yay for me!
I know it’s silly, but I just didn’t want to deal with that to. I would have of course if it came to that, but it was just one less thing I didn’t want to deal with.
2) She may be able to do the surgery Laproscopically which will be a lot less invasive and make healing and dealing with having your guts cut out a bit easier.
I told her to give it a try but I wouldn’t get pissy if she has to revert to the old “Whack em & Hack em” to get what she needs done.
She’s gonna take my Gallbladder while she’s in there and a few Lymph Nodes and some Liver samples also.
I told her to whack out as much of those Liver Lesions as possible and cauterize it with a cigar if she wanted. She said something about no smoking in the OR or she’d try it.
Damn if I don’t get to do that lovely Bowel Prep again Sunday! Oh well. Gotta be clean for this too. At least I don’t have to rush because of scheduling it like I did the first time so I won’t be up all night racing to the shitter.
I can do it all day instead. Doesn’t sound like much but believe me, that’s a way better option.
Feeling better after talking to her. Her approach to discussing this was much better than the Oncologist yesterday.
She basically said the same things, just in a way that wasn’t so damn depressing.
We talked about the Chemo mix and she straight up told me it was gonna suck. She called it a “Bitches Brew” I believe.
We talked statistics also and while she was direct, her delivery was just better.
Or maybe I’ve had 24 hours to digest it and was better prepared to hear it. That may be all it was, I don’t know.
My heads better today and I have a zillion things to get lined up and investigate yet. My poor wife is gonna be wearing out her notebook and phone/internet researching options and what not.
Statistically, the prognosis sucks. I’m gonna do my best & try to NOT be in the bad Stats column.
No telling how that’s gonna work out yet. But I’ll do whatever I need to do on my part.
I’m not a roll over and die kinda guy by nature. so getting in Monday is good for me.
Talk to ya later.
February 22, 2012
Made the drive up North and got the PET scan done earlier today. No big deal. The only hard part was holding my arms out over my head for the 10-15 minutes required for the scan.
The arthritis in my right shoulder was killing me by the time it was over and I was having a hard time holding still. And since I wanted good pictures, I needed to hold still.
They finally came in there and told me they were done and that was a great relief.
Was back home by 1:30 and kicked back till the appointment with the Oncologist at 5:00.
DocO is a good practitioner and has done a lot of good for a whole lot of people and I was anxious to hear what she had to say.
Until she started talking anyway.
Seems the scope showed the effected area of the colon quite well and they got a bunch of good biopsies and pictures.
Trouble is it’s way worse than I thought.
It’s circumferential and has damn near obstructed things. Think of a doughnut inside of a pipe and you’ll get the idea.
OK, I had already figured that I was gonna get a hunk of me cut out and that didn’t really change anything.
When she moved into the chemo area I was still hanging with her.
That’s when the conversation went South for me.
She was not at all encouraging about any sort of long term outlook at all.
Now maybe she was hedging her bet so as to not inflate my hopes or what. I don’t know.
But what she did say was really not what I wanted to hear.
As you can expect, I’m a bit bummed tonight. Tomorrows a new day and I’ll get back to work on getting my good attitude back in working order. I’ll also see the surgeon tomorrow.
I picked this particular surgeon because she has small hands and nice Boobs.
Ok, that’s not really true, but I thought it sounded good. Can’t start to soon on getting that good attitude back, eh?
So yeah, I’m a little bummed tonight. What is this now, day 6 into this whole mess?
Yes, and if your wondering, I’m getting a 2nd opinion. I know the surgery is not optional, but we’ll see about the treatment after that.
Don’t have the funds to just jet off to any old place and see about this, but there are other options I need to explore.
That’s it for tonight.
Talk more after I see Dr Small Hands/Big Boobs tomorrow.
February 22, 2012
Well, the scope went fine yesterday. When I showed up they had decided to do both an upper and lower, so I got em both done.
Sort of a One Stop Shopping Experience.
Once they give ya the Versed and Demerol you don’t give a shit what they’re doing anyway.
We stopped on the way to the hospital and bought a cheap bouquet of flowers for DrDan.
I figured since we were taking our relationship to a new level it was the thing to do.
Everyone got a good laugh out of it and lightening the mood some was the idea.
He snapped a couple of pictures for me while he was in there too just so I could see what exactly it is that’s trying to kill me. Not sure where the wife put them, but I’ll post em up later.
Back on schedule with the PET scan this afternoon, “God willin’ and the Creak don’t rise”.
And hopefully see the Oncologist tomorrow.
So we are about there on getting a plan laid out and that’s a good thing.
I don’t know if I’d mentioned this before or not, but I was diagnosed about 10 years ago with Lupus. Fortunately, I have the type that generally only shows up on the skin in various annoying forms and during times of high stress.
Yes, it showed up on my back and elbows just about the time that my belly pain started. Yeah, maybe I should have made the connection.
I don’t know. There’s lots of things that look better in hindsight and it’s best to not dwell on em.
Funny thing is, as we pulled into the parking lot yesterday my face began breaking out in the classic Butterfly Pattern rash.Ya think that maybe I’m more stressed than I thought?
I’m feeling pretty good this morning with no residual effects from yesterday. Up early because my sleep cycle just doesn’t know how to act. Maybe a few more days early to bed, early to rise will help things straighten out.
That’s it for now.